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Just Ask: Another Lesson Learned
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Columnist Fawn Caveney
Do not be afraid to ask! That is one of the biggest lessons I have learned the hard way over and over again. Recently I was reminded of this lesson in a frustrating, costly fashion.
Back in my early college journey I actually did complete an Associates Degree in business banagement and travel tourism. After working as an office manager for years, starting and running two businesses, and playing in the business field, I think I subconsciously wanted to forget that I had that degree. I forgot it so well that I did not ASK or clarify with the Registrar’s office why it was not accepted and utilized in my transfer to BSU.
After 12 unnecessary credits and one whole semester of student loans, I ASKED why?
The answer: oh we must have missed that.
I do not blame them, I blame myself and the old thinking process of “they must know best” or “I don’t want to ask and bother someone.” You know, all those fears and thoughts you plague yourself with instead of asking.
I should have known better. I have learned this lesson over and over and I teach my own children to not be afraid to ask. Saying to them, “there is no such thing as a dumb question”.
I guess I need more practice.
Painfully I had learned this my second year of college when I was assigned a young grad student as an advisor. I was young, naïve and chicken. I think he did the best he could under the circumstances. However, his guidance threw me into a down-hill slide. I was in classes I was not ready to handle. I never worked harder to fail a class in my life. It took me a long time to climb back up the ladder into a decent GPA.
The most recent lesson reminds me again that it is my privilege to ask and inquire. To seek out and research the answers to what makes the most sense for my college journey. Of course asking applies to all arenas, the job interview, house buying, car buying, etc….
Compared to 27 years ago, the Professors and teachers today seem to have many more demands upon their desks. More students to advise, more papers to publish and write, and more classes to teach. As a student it is my responsibility to make sure that I have an advisor that is interested in my college journey, that I am on track to completing my degree and to ask how I can improve my grade.
Recently my 10-year-old son was struggling with his math teacher and I asked him “Did you ask her how you could do better in this class? Have you thought about how hard it is to teach all of you at the same time? Maybe she does not know you are having a hard time with these problems?”
My son gave me a great gift in reminding me that I too can ask and in asking find the answers that will help me on my journey.
The moral of the story, do not be afraid to ASK. The college journey, the life journey is a unique and special one for each and every one of us, in that we must not be afraid to inquire how we might manifest and create that which we dream.