-
1 of 10
-
2 of 10
-
3 of 10
-
4 of 10
-
5 of 10
-
6 of 10
-
7 of 10
-
8 of 10
-
9 of 10
-
10 of 10
No One’s Innocent : Even teachers
Archive
Comments
Story
If teachers were a flavor, they would be an average (yet pungent) vanilla. Plain, not a lot of flavor and totally devoid of all the mint-chocolate-chip goodness of their fellow counterparts. High school teachers in particular seem to lack the most pizzazz of all. When I think back on my high school teachers, I can come up with four distinctive characteristics they each exhibited: astuteness, homeliness, intelligence and they were all somewhat dull . yawn.
Though I won’t tell you which school, teacher or class the following story deals with, I will tell you it’ll give you an entirely different perspective on the uninteresting, un-stimulating teacher as you know it – funny I should use that word.
Stimulating.
One high school teacher I had was obsessed with Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet.” She became excited and flushed when talking about their teenage love, Juliet’s creamy bosom and the night Romeo and his lover consummated their hasty marriage. High School Teacher would recount time and again how “lustful and passionate” that night must have been for the two characters, how much they probably “yearned for each other” and how much their “desire for each other must have been more than they could bear.”
I remember students shifting uncomfortably in their seats, their eyes darting from floor to teacher, teacher to floor. And I remember wondering if it was legal for High School Teacher to talk like this.
One assignment she gave us required that we find advertisements (from a pile of magazines High School Teacher supplied) to create some sort of modern-day “Romeo and Juliet” storyboard. As my assignment-partner and I flipped through the pages of magazine after magazine, we came upon something creepy. Assignment partner raised her hand.
“Excuse me, High School Teacher,” she began, “you said these magazines are from your own collection?”
High School Teacher nodded as her thin, mousy hair fell around her bare, un-made-up face. She pushed her bottle-cap glasses back onto the bridge of her nose and continued reading “Romeo and Juliet” excitedly from behind her desk. Assignment Partner nudged me with her elbow.
“Look at this,” she said, horrified, sucking in a deep breath.
I looked down at a magazine on Assignment Partner’s desk. My jaw fell open. Assignment Partner had flipped to the very back of the magazine where it’s commonplace in some women’s magazines for kinky advertisers to place ads for adult toys. There in plain red ink, “The Tongue” was circled in the back of High School Teacher’s magazine. The shipping and tax was calculated in High School Teacher’s handwriting in the sidebar. “The Tongue” had an accompanying black and white photograph of a woman writhing in pleasure, with her head thrown back and her mouth agape, wearing nothing more than her bra and the merchandise being advertised.
Below the fuzzy photo was a caption that read:
“The very popular remote-vibrating panty provides endless (and risqu